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God wants me to listen. That’s the message I’ve been getting recently. I confess this is a long-standing problem area for me. I have a quote on my refrigerator from Stephen Covey: “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”

That is me, all right. Instead of listening, my mind wanders off into my own memories. I often interrupt people because something they say sparks a thought that I can’t wait to share.

In the past, when I heard advice about listening I would always think, “But what about me? When is it my turn to be listened to?” I spent half my life feeling like nobody was interested in anything I had to say.

I think that’s part of being human. We want to feel like we’re important. Jesus’ disciples probably felt this way, too. I bet they were a little dismayed when he told them, “Whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all.” (Mark 10:43)

All of us want to be listened to. The Bible says God made us in his image, so that must mean that he wants to be listened to. But it also means that he listens to us. When God walked with Adam and Eve in the garden, I bet he was not doing all the talking.

I have come to realize that when I don’t know what to do to help someone, the best thing I can do is just listen to them. And how did God teach me this lesson? He put somebody into my life who is undergoing a lot of problems, and they phone me frequently and talk for at least an hour each time. And I, weak human that I am, was very annoyed by this. I grumbled and complained. And yes, sometimes I didn’t answer when I saw that a call was from them.

Until the day that they thanked me. Talking to me helped them deal with their stress, they told me. And off to one side, God quietly said, “Do you get it now?”

And when is it my turn? That’s easy enough. When I pray. God always listens to me. Patiently. For however long I want to talk.

And I see now that listening to people gives my prayers better focus. Instead of just a general, “Please bless this person,” I can talk to God about their specific needs. I am sure when Jesus went off alone to pray, he prayed for each of his disciples individually and specifically. Shortly before he was arrested, Jesus told Simon Peter, “Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail.” (Luke 22: 31-32)

It all starts with listening. We have to hear the Word before we can follow it. And we have to hear others before we can know how to pray for them.

I am glad I don’t have to rely on just my own puny strength to learn to listen to others. And one specific prayer for myself now is that I will continue to listen to God so that I can keep on learning things from him.