I still struggle with prayer. Why is this so difficult for me? Prayer is just talking to God, I have been told, and I believe that. So why do I have so much trouble thinking of what to say?
I’ve been thinking about it this week. I thought back to the prayers I heard in church as I was growing up. Maybe I feel hesitant because my prayers can never reach the grandeur of the ones the preacher declaimed from the pulpit. Maybe it’s because I know that God is omniscient. What could I possibly say to him that he doesn’t already know?
I immediately knew where that thought had come from. Satan loves to twist what we read in the Bible to trip us up. He even tried that trick on Jesus. And I also remembered that the Bible tells us not to envy what others have, which is what we do when we compare ourselves to others. And when I thought about the preacher’s elegantly worded prayers, I suddenly heard Jesus say, as he did to Peter on one memorable occasion, “What is that to you? You must follow me.” (John 21:23) In other words, “Don’t look at him; keep your eyes on me.”
That story also illustrates that when you ask God a question, he always answers. It’s not always the answer I expect, or in the way I expect, but I always know it’s from him. So it didn’t surprise me when I read a comment in my Bible later that “prayer is a lifeline for the believer and how we experience God.”
I immediately thought of emails. My best friend and I email to each other every day, sometimes several times in a day. I check my email several times a day to see if she has written. I always feel so disappointed if it is a long time before I hear from her. Occasionally, I won’t hear from her for an entire day, and then I start to worry that something might be wrong.
Then I had to wonder: Is that how God feels when he goes a long time without hearing from me?
In reading the Bible, one message that stands out is that God wants to have a personal relationship with us. And why do I have such a close relationship with my friend? Because we talk to each other every day. When something happens in my day, or I see something I think she’d enjoy seeing or knowing about, I can’t wait to tell her about it. And it doesn’t have to be big or important, either. Often, our emails are just about the chores and errands we did that day. What we did and how we felt and what we thought.
Shouldn’t I be just as eager to share all that with God? My friend is far away from me in another state, but God is always right next to me. Moses told the Israelites, “The Lord our God is near us whenever we pray to him.: (Deuteronomy 4:7)
So what I’ve learned so far is that prayer isn’t just talking at God or to him; prayer is EXPERIENCING God, his very presence. And I don’t need to feel hesitant or intimidated. Paul told us, “In him (Christ) and through faith in him we may approach God with freedom and confidence.” (Ephesians 3:12)
So what have I learned from all this? I need to stop being so shy about talking to God. He is eagerly waiting to hear from me! And suddenly, I can think of a lot of things to talk to him about. I think I’ll start by telling him how much I am enjoying this fall weather.
Until next time, may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace. (Romans 15:13)